Scary Stuff

Among other things, this webblog aspires to a DEED OF FAITH.

Now what I have in mind by faith here, is not the automatism of an uncritically accepted belief system, as occurs in fundamentalism. And such fundamentalism occurs in the New Age milieu of which I was a part, as it does in religion. Ideas are simply absorbed without consciousness and credulously professed.

No, what I have in mind by faith, is an act taken in a mind torn by contraries. And as the evolution of human consciousness progresses over the centuries, the mind becomes ever more capable of being so torn.

Speaking very personally, my mind over all my life has been torn by many contraries. Secular materialist belief systems have vied with New Age belief systems. And these have vied with esoteric Christian belief systems which have in turned vied with traditional Christian belief systems.

At the end of the day, I confess I have found no other answer with all of these raging contraries, than to try to be as conscious as I possibly can (writing out many pages of journals) and with the fruit of this reflection – consciously **decide**.

But it can be very scary to choose. The educated mind has so many contraries from which to select. The mind in fact can seem to produce an infinity of options. In the midst of all of these, the heart is whispering …

How to listen to heart and mind … and then - choose. This has been my problem, at least.

To return to the example of the Sacraments. I receive the Eucharist. Sometimes the after-effect is very subtle. Sometimes not. But still the mind chatters on. Are you sure it isn’t your imagination? Or yes, there is an effect, but are you sure the effect was not the product of assuming the attitude of intense attention and devotion? Or is the effect healthy? What of the esoteric Christian accusation that the liturgy has an effect, but its effect can be hypnotic? And etcetera. And etcetera. And etcetera.

Now even though the effect of the Eucharist alone can be subtle, I must say that that this is not so true in my experience, receiving both the Sacraments of Absolution and Communion in succession. There the effect for me is uniformly one of a distinct and beautiful wholesomeness coming into my psyche … often still palpable the next day.

Still the mind can chatter on. On and on and on. Now, perhaps a new epistemology will arise in our midst to challenge modernity’s marginalisation of the Sacred. But until then, as far as I can see - a deed of faith must be made. At least it must be made for such a one as myself. John Paul’s pontificate was marked by these words ‘Be not afraid!’ And I believe he said them, for ones such as myself who find faith SCARY …

Yes, it is scary to affirm the whisper of the heart. Even when that whisper has also been affirmed by centuries of experience of uncounted numbers of great and humble alike. In the all the mocking noise of the world, it is even scarier to affirm in public what one finds in one’s own depths – even after prolonged, intensive enquiry.

But I believe the public world needs such affirmative deeds of faith. Particularly in a world of ‘intelligentsia’, which not only strips Mystery from the ordinary world, but strips Mystery from the Church. A demythologising Church and world need deeds of faith … faith in the Mystery. For as far as I can see … as far as I can see … our dehumanising world needs the affirmation of Mystery more than ever.

Webblog resumes Monday after the Sabbath. Gloria tibi, Domine.